How Starting Over Can Change Your Life


How Starting Over Can Change Your Life

Written by Randi Bateman

Ever since I was a little girl, I had long, thick, beautiful hair. I loved my hair. My hair was my life. I loved the fact that my hair was something people noticed and complimented me on. Never would I consider cutting my hair off. NEVER. But I did.

It was the summer before for my junior year in high school when I decided to do the big chop. This wasn’t just a chopping off of some damaged ends, but I was going bald. I went to a natural hair salon and let them go to work. However, when my mom picked me up she looked at me with shock and took me to her own barber. Once we arrived, my now barber, went to work and left me with a look I never thought I could pull off. Little did I know, this cut became my staple look. I was doing this just to start my hair all over and get a fresh start, but this short cut journey took me to a place I decided that I didn’t want to leave.  A place of true self love. I grew my hair out a couple of times, but I never felt just right.

There is power in moving from behind what hides you. I didn’t realize it, but I hid behind my hair. My hair was my security. My hair was my safety net. At the time, I was just cutting my hair to reach my natural hair goals, but as time went on, I started to unpack and understand what self-love meant for me. Cutting my hair changed my life because I began to learn who I really was.

This journey definitely taught me what self-care means for me. I’m not saying you have to cut your hair off to discover yourself, but sometimes you have to step out of the ordinary to find what you need. Cutting my hair was not ordinary for me. Being bald in high school was not ordinary for me. Being secure in my short cut was not an easy process, but it forced me to dig deep inside of myself and find the confidence I was lacking. Though I had beautiful hair, I didn’t believe I was beautiful. Cutting my hair stripped the security blanket off and required me to look myself in the eyes, with no distractions, and be vulnerable. I had to learn that I was beautiful. It was far from an easy process – it was extremely difficult especially when I got comments like:

“Why would you cut off all of your hair?! It was so beautiful!” or “Wow, I like your haircut but I really liked you with hair” or the worst one of all “When are you going to grow it back?”. I know these comments and questions didn’t have malicious intent, but it made me think about what I was lacking. It made me question if I needed to have my hair in order to be considered beautiful. It also made me learn to start affirming myself. It taught me to walk proudly and stand in my uniqueness.  

I challenge you to step out of the ordinary to find your extraordinary. Affirm yourself in every step of the journey. Don’t look back. Keep going. Meet yourself where you are at. Stand tall in your difference. Be your own change.

Keep up with Randi on Instagram: @randibateman

Kween KlarkeComment